Tastes Like Burning.
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Get out there and get your bigfoot on.
Oh wow this is actually a genius form of photo bombing
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“Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.” — Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency (Douglas Adams)(via the-meaning-of-liff)
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Yous guys all need to turn off the computers and go for a walk or some shit. Pointless arguments all day errday.
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It’ll be fun to put Leela on my shoulders I thought.
Fun fun fun.Then she barfed.
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I just can’t even with this shit.Woman discreetly shits in her own hand and tosses it outside nightclub
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So Saturday something happened that really got under my skin. I can normally handle myself when people are acting like assholes but this particular situation unnerved me.
We were down the shore and when I sat down to eat at Hartell’s, Jay got up to get himself ketchup and napkins. The table next to us was filled with mooks. I tend to not pay much attention to dudebros until I realized I was the subject of their conversation. They were talking about my boobs. They were staring. Then they continued to discuss my breasts and what they’d like to do with them. Then one started talking about how it’s time he met some sluts.
Normally, I’d do my best to make them as uncomfortable as possible by loudly calling them out on their blatant assholery… But then I realized why this bothered me so much more. Leela was sitting right there. These dumb sacks of shit were talking about me like I was some whore that they could do what they please with right in front of my daughter. They even used to term MILF. I don’t take that term as a compliment. Oh, and they even called Jay a wienie.
Luckily Jay didn’t hear any of this because he’s not great at keeping his cool. I just sat quietly through dinner, anxious and uncomfortable while Jay gave Leela a speech on the trouble with dudebros unaware that he was surrounded by a table of them. -
Today (well, yesterday) is the one year anniversary of my big break. It sorta marked the beginning of the possibly one of the worst times of my life.
Next pregnancy, my goal is to not fall down any stairs… twice… and break both of my feet and almost die of kidney complications that cause me to delivery a preemie.
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“Sir,’ I said to the universe, ‘I exist.’
‘That,’ said the universe,
‘creates no sense of obligation in me whatsoever.”— Douglas Adams (via hitchhikersguidetothegalaxy) -
While I lay on the operating table being closed up unconscious to the world around me, you were meeting our little girl. You told me it was surreal. You didn’t expect things to happen how they did. You thought I’d be holding her and you’d be standing proudly next to me… but instead there was this little baby in front of you. Without me.
You were the first person to hold Leela. I know you were terrified but you did it. You were the first person to bond with her. I’m amazed by your relationship now. She laughs when you’re with her and her eyes follow you everywhere. She is developing your sense of humor and is really mimicking you these days.
I see so much of my father in you, someone who fiercely loved his children and did everything to give us the best in life.
I love you. There is no greater joy than to be a part of your life, to raise our daughter together and watch her learn and grow and play and love. You’re amazing. Thank you for all that you do. Happy Father’s Day!
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Jessey and Ed!!
My warmest congratulations to you both! I can’t tell you how excited I am!
